Category

Inspire Ideas

Comparison – The Thief of Joy

By | Have Fun, Inspire Ideas, Invoke Passion

Comparison /kəmˈperəsən/ noun

:the act of looking at things to see how they are similar or different

When I read my friend Francesca’s BLOG post recently, I found her message so relevant and poignant, and I wanted to share it on Telltale Ten. Too often we are judging ourselves by comparing ourselves to others. As I get older, I care less and less about what people think. I was also hit by a car (for real) which may have accelerated the awakening of my “I don’t really give a shit” nerve.

I constantly see people in both my personal and professional lives suffering from unnecessary misery (not to mention driving me a little cuckoo) by constantly comparing themselves to others. If we would all just mind our own business and stop worrying about what everyone else is doing or not doing, everyone would be a lot happier. At the very least, I would be less annoyed dealing with folks who plant themselves on the pity pot regularly.

If your life goals are to be as insecure, annoying, unhappy and as full of self-doubt as possible, I highly encourage you to constantly compare yourself to others. Better yet, compare your life to other’s social media lives. That will get you to your goal even faster. It’s pretty much a surefire rocket ride to low self-esteem.

I love the idea of writing letters to ourselves. Letters to our past selves and future selves. I really loved Cheka’s message – and she is pretty damn funny too. Hope you all enjoy this week’s Telltale Ten.

An Open Letter to My Former Self

Guest Post by Francesca Campisi

Have you ever wanted to write and postmark a letter to your younger self?

What would you say?

Would it change anything?

Lately, LIFE has been teaching me some very important lessons. We reap what we sow (obviously not something new I learned, but ya get my drift). From the time I was 21 – I sowed emotions of hurt, anger, negativity, bitterness and just so much yuckkkkkk. It took me many years, tears, and breakdowns to change my views and to start sowing joy, love, gratitude, confidence, and happiness. I reflect back on my younger days and wonder if I could have prevented the pain. But, I wouldn’t be the person I am today. I wouldn’t have had to fight for that person. My story may be rough with weeds and thorns but it’s starting to blossom up roses (“WHOA!” As JOEY from BLOSSOM would say. I’m reaching huh?) My story may be long, emotional and a roller coaster ride, but let’s be honest, who likes an easy cookie cutter read?!?!

Dear Younger Self,

Where do I start? Do I start singing, ‘A Whole New World’ to you, just as Aladdin did to Jasmine while on a magic carpet ride?

|Sidenote: I have SUCCESSFULLY applied a Disney movie to my life. I can die happy now.|

Probably not. Because younger self you are cynical at times and emo.

I wish I could save you from all the pain and heartache you will experience over the next 10 years. But if I could save you, then you wouldn’t be the (WONDER) Woman of God you are today. You wouldn’t be able to experience all the happiness, joy, love, gratitude, and beauty that came from the times that were just yuckyyyyy.

Francesca, you will never be perfect. And that is okay. You will fail, fall, and plunder down some ugly stairs. But you will get back up. Do not be afraid for what’s to come. For what is ahead is a life filled with purpose and promise. From the failures, heartache, and pain – you will rise like a phoenix from the ashes.

You will meet many people, who will be in your life for one minute and gone the next. These are not your people. You will be lied too and taken advantage of. You will lose yourself in people and forsake all that you believe in. This is the ugly truth of life – that along the way sometimes we lose ourselves. However, you are not innocent in this. You also have cast stones and hurt others that have come along your path. But we can find our way back. Your tribe, your people, will love you even when you are at your lowest of lows. When you find your tribe, LOVE them hard. And in the end, your FAMILY will always be there to love and support you.

Don’t let the world views of beauty change what God has created in you. You are more than a number on the scale or the size of your Lululemons. You must learn to love yourself before you can love another. Don’t hold back from letting your light shine. The social media platforms, Facebook or Instagram, the double-tap likes, or the amount of friends do not define your worth in this world. Popularity is fleeting. Love is everlasting.

Never compare where you are in life to someone else’s highlight reel. Comparison is the thief of joy. Learn to choose faith over fear. You are a sinner by nature but by the grace of God you have been saved and you are made whole by his perfect love.

Charles Spurgeon says, “A good character is the best tombstone. Those who loved you and were helped by you will remember you when forget me nots have withered. Carve your name on hearts not on marble.” The educator Edgar Dale, who developed the ‘Cone of Learning’ concept, claims that after 2 weeks we tend to only remember 10% of what we read but we remember 90% of what we say and do. What YOU say and do, how YOU treat others, when YOU choose to love or be kind, and express gratitude – these are the things will be left of you after you are gone.

This letter may be filled with many ‘DON’Ts’ but I hope you DO know how ah-mazing you are and how much you have to offer this world. You may not make everyone happy and at times may not be enough for others, but you can’t please everyone – you aren’t a jar of PEANUT BUTTAAAA.

But know YOU ARE ENOUGH for YO’SELF.

Love,

Francesca

Happy Blog-iversary

By | Create Value, Inspire Ideas, Invoke Passion

Dear Diary Blog –

According to research, the average lifespan of a blog is only 100 days. I didn’t make this up. Holy cow. So how did we make it to two years? Let’s be clear, that is 730 days – sounds more impressive right? Or in research speak, more than seven times the average. In blog life  you could say Telltale Ten is geriatric. She can’t hear very well, forgets things and has to pee a lot. Like blog, like author.

To celebrate the 2-year anniversary of Telltale Ten I thought it would be fun to go back and re-read the blogs. It was part fun and part torture Anyway, I also thought I’d share some of my favorite and most popular blog posts. Too bad these things don’t earn residuals. In all fairness, there were some I wanted to delete from the Blogosphere altogether, but since I am not technically savvy enough to do so, the suckiest of sucky entries are still there. The following you might find worth actually reading:

1. Just When You Think You’re Ready for the Week (August 1, 2017) Be Genuine, Create Value
2. When Life Kicks You in the A** (January 25, 2017) Be Genuine, Be Honest, Be Reasonable
3. Lazy and Genius Had a Baby (November 22, 2016) Be Genuine, Have Fun, Inspire Ideas
4. Indecision – The Evil Accomplice of Procrastination (October 18, 2016) Be Clear, Be Reasonable, Inspire Ideas, Take Risks
5. HALT — Stop, In the Name of Love (September 20, 2016) Be Clear, Be Genuine, Be Honest, Be Reasonable
6. Let It Go – Helpful Advice, Not Just an Annoying Song (August 30, 2016) Be Reasonable, Take Risks
7. Save Your Apple – No Teacher’s Pets Here (June 28, 2016) Create Value, Inspire Ideas, Invoke Passion, Take Risks
8. So You Wanna Be the Boss? (August 2, 2016) Be Honest, Be Reasonable, Take Risks
9. What Do Waffles, Luna Bars and Diet Coke Have in Common? (June 21, 2016) Be Genuine, Have Fun, Invoke Passion
10. I Ran Out of Gas (May 17, 2016) Be Genuine, Be Reasonable, Take Risks

I’ve learned a ton of lessons during my last two years as a blogger, and two worth noting from a business perspective.  One, free marketing is awesome. Two, blogging can be a great way to help make key decisions about those who be might be a ‘fit”. When clients or prospects or employees identify with the blog content, it’s a good sign they may be a good fit to work with; they are probably just the right amount of crazy.

My biggest aha from my two-year lookback, is that I really suck at writing things I am not passionate about or that are not current issues/challenges/adventures/happenings in my life. Here’s the truth. I don’t totally LOVE most of what I wrote in 2017. Some of it I don’t like at all. Reflecting on the topics I first tackled in the beginning has been a good reminder of why I wanted to start a blog in the first place. Looking ahead, my goal for Telltale Ten is to expand my audience to reach more people who are searching for that extra push to get them to the next level, whether it be in their personal lives, starting a business, growing a business, being a better parent, or a healthier person. So stay tuned for more whacky top ten lists, life hacks, and real talk. Let’s have a little fun and laugh as much as possible – at my expense of course.

 

Thanks for reading!

A Micro Dose of Motivation

By | Be Honest, Create Value, Inspire Ideas, Motivate Others

What Motivates You?

As a startup leader, a HUGE part of my job centers around motivation. Convincing a group of super smart (and highly likeable) individuals to come join a startup, isn’t always easy. And once I convince them to join, I have to make sure they want to stay.

Motivate Others is one our Telltale Ten and SoapBox was founded on those ten principles. Motivation is key. But what does that mean? Where does motivation come from? What gets people motivated, what keeps people motivated, and how can we use motivation to accomplish our goals?

I have learned over the years, that motivation is not a one-size-fits-all. It is different for everyone. I feel like I get to know people pretty well, but you don’t know what you don’t know. After a recent TedTalk Tuesday lead by our Director of Systems and Programming, Aaron Cole, I got super excited to learn more about what motivates the staff. He talked about his motivation to complete his goal of running a marathon on all seven continents and shared his experience about running his most recent marathon in the Outback. I was inspired to learn more about what motivates others on my team. Instead of relying on my perceptions, instead I went with the direct approach and I asked my staff to tell me what motivates them. Sometimes the simplest (and most obvious) approach is the best.

What surprised me was that it wasn’t only big things (like feeling accomplished or helping the community) that motivated people, but small things like walking a dog, or hazelnut coffee. For me, I get really excited by an accomplishment as small as using up the last bit of a tube of chap stick (like seriously, do you ever get to the end of a chap stick before you lose it or it melts or your kid or your dog eats it – no right?).

The point I’m trying to make is that motivation can come in big and small packages. Maybe one of the items on this list will be a micro dose of motivation for you this week. Now the next challenge begins for me as a leader. How do I help make sure the staff is experiencing those things that make them happy and motivated?

Aaron Cole
Director of Systems

Food
Run clubs
Competition
Destination Runs

Adriana Hemans
Director of Marketing

Personal growth
Creative expression
Financial independence
Travel

Allison Flowers
Research Director

Making my kids proud
Making others feel good about themselves
Having a can-do mentality 

Andrea Sipos
Project Manager

My family
Animals
Nature

Angela Pack
Senior Account Executive

My child’s happiness
A clean & organized house
Helping in my community

Dan Parcon
VP, Operations

My faith
My child
Making a difference in the world

Elinor Gaida
VP, Research & Analytics

Coffee
Music
Walking a dog
Meeting with friends and family

Jacqueline Rosales
Chief of Operations

Connecting with close friends
Doing something nice for others
Organizing/Cleaning
Laughing

Kevin Moran
Support Specialist

Humor
Keeping promises
Food
Exercise (occasionally)

Michaela Petersen
Project Manager

Bettering myself
Broadening my intelligence
Contributing to the team

Paul Janowitz
CEO, icanmakeitbetter

Family & Travel
Improving the community
Hard work

Sam Ashburner
Project Manager

My new house
Exceeding my own expectations
Hazelnut Coffee

Sandeep Babu
Operations Manager

Travel
Culture
The little things
Finding fullfillment from helping others

Savanna Ayala
Bids & Feasibility Associate

Wine
Laughing
Food
Books
Alone time

Trina Martell
Project Manager

Expanding my knowledge base
Creativity of any kind
Music
Sharing knowledge
Kindness

Take a step back and ask yourself what motivates you. Write it down. Post it where you can see it and when you are feeling a little unmotivated, try one of things on your list to get you out of your funk.

Yay! My Kid is Not a Jerk.

By | Create Value, Inspire Ideas, Invoke Passion, Motivate Others

So back in April, I wrote a BLOG called “Lessons From a Ten Year Old” about my seemingly unreasonable happiness over my daughter Antonella’s journey of turning a No into a Yes. Through hard work, pure determination, and relentless desire she earned a spot on the Hyht Gymnastics Pre-Team. In case you didn’t read it (you should), here’s the recap. Her coach gave her the good news that she finally made pre-team, but in the same breath she also told her, “I only want kids who work hard. If you stop working hard, you will be removed from the pre-team. If you keep working hard, you may actually make it from pre-team to team. Your work is just starting.”

Your work is just starting. Super powerful words. How a ten year old will act on those words is a total crap shoot. Ella had worked her a$$ off to get to her goal and it was just the beginning. Her commitment up until that point simply prepared her for the next phase of hard work. It was just one obstacle of many. In my last BLOG on this topic, I wrote about how happy I was that she didn’t make the pre-team on the first go around. And I meant it. I still mean it. Once she made the pre-team I was CERTAIN she was not going to like it. It meant more practice, which meant more drills, more working out and worst of all (for Ella) running sprints.

Well I was wrong. She embraced the challenge. Not without complaint, but she kept at it. She got her Dad to build her a beam and taught herself the Level 3 Team USA Gymnastics Beam routine from YouTube – she wasn’t even on the team. She had a list of skills she had to learn, and slowly kept knocking them off the list. The worst one was the back handspring. That damn back handspring. She practiced for months and months and just couldn’t get over the fear. She couldn’t, correction, wouldn’t do it. We endured months of “Will you spot me?” day after day. Her Dad and I were sure she would never get it. Some days I wanted to say, “No, I will not spot you again – just give it up. You won’t get it. Let’s just go inside.” You probably think I am a total douche, but seriously, try doing the same thing, day after day, watching a kid just flail around. It is not fun. And God bless her nanny. I bet she spotted that kid 1000 times – at minimum. But she kept at it.

She saved up her money sold stuff on Etsy and Poshmark and finally earned enough money to buy a tumbling trampoline. Yes, she is a working actor earning a nice paycheck. But she doesn’t get to spend that money – sorry kid. You will thank me some day when we didn’t let you blow all the dough. She even talked her Nana into having a yard sale in the dead of the summer in the heat. It was 110 degrees that day. But she had some money to make! She is a very persuasive young lady. And guess what? It took several months, but she finally earned the $500 to buy the trampoline.
She practices on that thing until it gets dark. “Wait, just one more. Can you watch?” Armed with her mat, her homemade beam, and her tumbling trampoline, she has just kept on keeping on. And guess what? She got that back handspring, and a dozen or so other skills. One by one. She would come home after practice each day and tell me if she earned gym bucks for a new skill. Some days she would bust through the door screaming “I got my back hip circle today” or whatever it was and other times she would say she had more work to do.

Yesterday she turned eleven years old. Today she went to practice despite being convinced she has a broken toe (she is the one convinced not us or we would actually take her to a doctor – we aren’t total a$$hole parents). Her coach pulled her aside before class started and told her she made the team. Ella had NO idea she was going to get that news. No idea at all. She was just showing up, with her broken toe, to practice.

As her parent, my belly gets all squirmy with excitement thinking how it must have felt in her little heart when she got that news. How proud she must have felt, and how badly she wanted to run home and tell us. As a business leader, I find this type of unrelenting focus, unceasing drive and bullish tenacity to overcome something outside of your comfort zone, is what it takes to be great. And look at that, I may have just defined greatness (Why Tony the Tiger is My Idol).

Hack Attack!

By | Create Value, Inspire Ideas, Take Risks

Seven Amazing Hacks from One Unexpected Household Item

I’m a big fan of anything that makes life easier, more convenient, or less annoying. Any #lifehack posts that I stumble across on social media will immediately grab my attention. It’s possible that I spend more time reading about life hacks, than I actually save by doing the life hacks, but that’s a topic for another blog.

This blog is about one insignificant household item that can do about a million other things that it wasn’t even designed to do. (Reminds me of some people I know.) Here are seven of my favorite life hacks, all involving the humble dryer sheet. The best part is, for most of these hacks any brand will work, and they don’t even have to be new dryer sheets. Used ones work just as well.

  1. Remove nail polish. Glittery nail polish is a pain to get off. When you’re sick of looking like a Las Vegas showgirl, cut dryer sheets into small squares, soak them in acetone, and lay them on top of your nails. After a few minutes, the nail polish will rub off easily.
  2. Use instead of paint thinner to clean brushes. It’s not magic, it’s science. Science I won’t attempt to explain. Just try it. Lay a paintbrush over a dryer sheet, and pour water on top. The paint will slide right off.
  3. Clean your hairbrush. Instead of ripping out clumps of hair a few pieces at a time, soak the brush in warm water with a dryer sheet plopped in there. After a few minutes take it out and the hair just slides off.
  4. Sharpen scissors. When your scissors get dull from cutting up magazines, making DIY home décor, or cutting unidentifiable goo out of the dog’s hair, you can use a dryer sheet to sharpen up the blades again. Just rub the dryer sheet on each edge.
  5. Remove stains from the toilet bowl. Re-purpose a used dryer sheet as a toilet bowl scrubber. You don’t even have to scrub that hard. Gloves recommended.
  6. Scrub glass shower doors. A dryer sheet can remove water stains and calcium deposits. Add a couple drops of water, and wipe the doors down. You’ll want to share this one with everyone. Just don’t forget you heard it here first.
  7. Clean grease from pans. You can eliminate the crusty, burnt grease from your pans by soaking them in water, dish soap and a dryer sheet. Let it sit for one hour. Use that hour to catch up on Telltale Ten blog posts you may have missed.

Want more hacks? Check out Accessories to Make Your Traveling Life Easier — All From the Dollar Store.

Minus May Recap

By | Create Value, Inspire Ideas, Motivate Others

Trying to accomplish a goal? Your failure or success could come down to one important factor — accountability.

At SoapBox, goal setting is not just a part of individual performance reviews, but also a part of SoapBox team building.  And when you can pitch to the group with a cool name like Minus May, it seems fun. Setting personal goals within a team environment helps to:

  • Create a supportive work environment
  • Build a culture that values self-improvement
  • Provide accountability
  • Encourage non-work related conversation and check-ins
  • Increase the likelihood of achieving the goal (although based on the results we failed at this miserably)

It also puts people on blast knowing they have to publicly admit if they break their pledge (on this very public forum followed by dozens of readers called Telltale Ten) – it can make the difference between saying f**k it, or following through.

At the beginning of last month, we challenged the staff to come up with one thing that they would like to eliminate in order to improve their lives. We proposed the opposite of a “to do“ list that people generally default to when they want to accomplish something.

Spoiler: no one had a perfect Minus May. Some came close, a few made some slight progress. One forgot what was happening and one doesn’t understand A,B,C grading systems. You can read everyone’s recap below.

Nicole, Sales and Marketing Administrative Assistant
Goal: To save money
Minus: Her daily trips to Starbucks

Grade: A- 

While I have eliminated Starbucks before, the difference this time was the temptation factor that would still linger when I would make a Starbucks run for someone else. You either love Starbucks or you hate it…at least for most people I know. I breathe Starbucks, have more cups than needed, and always seem to make friends with a barista in various locations. The challenge itself wasn’t hard, I saved about $3.95 a day. Sometimes I would have more than one Starbucks a day, so I saved between $150 and $200 bucks for the entire month. I had moments of withdrawal, one moment where I went and did a Starbucks run for a few others, ordered one for myself and drank it there before coming back to the office. That was about it. I did notice cutting all the sugar from my coffee has slimmed me down, so I can’t complain at all. Now that I am able to have it again, I will slowly start to indulge in it. I don’t see myself going overboard because I like the idea of having a flatter stomach. Supplementing Starbucks for other brands or energy drinks will never become a full-time habit, I am committed to Starbucks forever!!

Melissa, Recruitment Specialist
Goal: To have a more positive outlook
Minus: Complaining

Grade: B-

For Minus May my goal was to stop complaining. I realized recently that I have a habit of holding on to negative thoughts, which sometimes can cloud my outlook on life. While I did not have a perfect Minus May, overall I am proud of myself for the progress that I made. Several times I was able to catch myself before I started to complain, and I was able to refocus my thoughts to look at the bright side of a situation. Even though Minus May is now over, I plan to continue to stop negative thoughts in their tracks and turn them around before they take over my mood.

Kevin, Online Panel Support
Goal: To reduce his cholesterol
Minus: Eating fast food

Grade: B

I avoided fast food, but then bought more processed food from the store. I learned that restaurant vegetarian options can’t compete with their steaks. If I was going to try it again I would limit myself to fewer cheat days.

Cynthia, Manager of Community Experience
Goal: To live a longer, healthier life
Minus: Smoking cigarettes

Grade: F

I would give myself an F, since I did take a puff from a cigarette twice during the last week of the month. The challenge was to give it up, and I did not give it up completely. During the month of May, I had several stressful personal issues come up, as well as additional work stress which made me crave cigarettes. Typically, I smoke more when I am stressed. Before Minus May I was smoking about half a pack a day and to go from that to two puffs in the last 31 days is pretty good in my book. I think I did better than expected. I did snack more, but I was prepared for that. Overall, I am extremely happy with the results and will continue my Minus May pledge into June.

Note from Jax to Cynthia (let’s see if she reads the BLOG): I am proud of you and the standards you have set. I am also proud you took way less puffs of cancer. If you keep it up for June, I will match the money you saved. Extra incentive when those two puffs seem so tempting.

Adolfo, Senior Project Manager
Goal: To save money
Minus: Drinking alcohol

Grade: C

To be honest, I forgot and didn’t really try. I did, however, limit my alcohol consumption, which helped with the goal of saving money. If I were to try it again, I would actually try next time. But I would hope there would be some sort of support system/reminders. I truly forgot we were doing this for May.

Kalean, Bids and Feasibility Associate
Goal: To be more productive at work
Minus: Hitting the snooze button

Grade: F

LOL, I did so horribly. My plan was to ease myself into this challenge. Normally I hit snooze around four times in the morning and my plan was lower that amount by one each day until my body was conditioned to waking up after the first alarm. I was able to take a longer a shower and didn’t feel rushed the first day, but the next morning I went right back to my habits and snoozed until I absolutely HAD to get up. I kind of found a new way to circumvent not being so rushed in the morning though. Now that I have colored hair I need to take more care of it than I used to so I started to shower at night so I’d have more time to focus on it being maintained properly. As a result, my mornings became less hectic and I came to work five to ten minutes earlier than normal each day this week. In essence, my laziness and apathy towards waking in up the morning couldn’t be fixed, but my vanity is what really helped my production at work.

Michaela, Bids and Feasibility Associate
Goal: Saving time and money
Minus: Shopping and buying unnecessary things

Grade: B

I was really determined to stick with my Minus May resolution – and it worked! I was able to hold on to more of my paycheck by not spending money and appreciating the things I already own. I had a couple of “splurges” here and there due to my vacation at the end of May, but all in all I give myself a solid B. I’d like to make this a long-term habit for the future and I think Minus May was a good practice run to test my determination!

Adriana, Director of Marketing
Goal: To lose weight
Minus: Snacking at night

Grade: C

I went into the month of May with the best intentions, to stop snacking at night for SoapBox’s Minus May challenge. I thought it would be easy. I pictured a thinner, happier me going into June and a bed with no crumbs in it. Turns out it was harder than I thought. Old habits are hard to break, especially habits involving delicious, salty snacks. (That’s my weakness.) I broke down more than once. Ok, like six times. But on the plus side, I ended up snacking less than I would have if I hadn’t made my Minus May pledge. Next time I set a similar goal for myself I will do a little more prep work, by planning out what I’m going to eat for the whole day, so I’m not starving at ten p.m. Pursuing a healthy lifestyle is a lifelong journey, and even though I didn’t have a perfect month, I may be a step or two closer to meeting my long term goal.

Myself, Lunatic, COO, Mom Blogger
Goal: Sleep a minimum of eight hours per night
Minus: Cell phone after eleven p.m.

Grade: B

I did stay committed to sleeping eight hours a night for the most part. I think all but a few nights, I got that eight hours. Sometimes even more. But, it was not really a result of keeping my minus commitment. Most weekend nights for example, I was up way past eleven. But I also was super aware of the eight-hour goal, so I would make up for it by sleeping in.

If I were going to try this again with the “off the phone by eleven” as the driver for eight hours of sleep, I would not watch any binge-worthy Amazon, Netflix or Showtime shows that lead to “just one more” or “just the first 15 minutes of the next one”. There were a few weeknights where I just couldn’t resist that “next episode” button and couldn’t just sleep in to make up for it seeing as I have a job here at SoapBox. Or maybe I could just start watching earlier…I usually watch only one hour per day starting at ten. Perhaps I should eliminate family dinners and watch more binge-worthy shows instead. That could work…

DO’s and DON’Ts of Public Speaking

By | Be Genuine, Create Value, Have Fun, Inspire Ideas

Let’s talk about “glossophobia”. What’s that? You don’t know what “glossophobia” means? Surprisingly, you could actually be suffering from it, and not even know the “official” name. It’s the medical term for stage fright, and a large percentage of Americans are affected by it — 28.4%.

Here’s the bad news. At some point in most people’s lives, they end up needing to present, speak in public, or otherwise put themselves on display. It can be awkward. I totally get why people hate it.

Here’s the good news. You can get better at it. You may even start to like it. The main thing is to keep it simple. Start practicing one or two things at a time, starting with these basic tips:

 

DO — Make eye contact with your audience.

DON’T — Stare like a serial killer.

 

DO — Show enthusiasm for the topic.

DON’T — Come off as so fanatical that your audience believes they are being recruited to join a cult.

 

DO — Establish your expertise.

DON’T — Announce that you know more about the topic than anyone who ever lived. Ever.

 

DO — Speak slowly so that the audience can understand you.

DON’T — Speak so slowly that your audience can’t follow your sentences because your pauses are so long.

 

DO — Avoid reading word for word from a script.

DON’T — Decide to wing it and forget everything you were going to say.

 

DO — Try to relax before the start of your talk.

DON’T — Knock back a few cocktails and go onstage drunk.

 

DO – Wear something you feel comfortable in.

DON’T – Wear your pajamas or sweats.

 

DO — Speak from the heart.

DON’T — Reveal overly personal information, like the time you peed your pants in 5th grade.

 

Have any public speaking tips of your own to share? Tweet me @jax_rosales

 

Lessons From a Ten Year Old

By | Inspire Ideas, Invoke Passion, Motivate Others

Don’t Raise Your Kid to Be an A$$

About two months ago my ten-year-old daughter was waiting on pins and needles to find out if she made pre-team at gymnastics. She wanted it so badly and was totally obsessed. We had no clue how she would fit it in with her other activities, but she was certain this was THE most important thing…like ever.

Finally, the news came. It turned out to be the best news ever. Well, from my perspective, not hers. She didn’t make the team. She was going to miss practice the day the coach was giving out the news and had to ask in advance. She wanted us to ask for her. There was no way we were going to do that. She timidly approached her coach (who is a total hard ass) and squeaked out, “Did I make it?” Her coach said no, and then proceeded to tell her what she needed to work on.

When she got home that night, she disappeared upstairs. My husband and I decided to go up and talk to her. We started to feel badly we made her go to the coach on her own, and started to second guess whether we were too strict with her. We walked up the stairs expecting to find her crying or otherwise sadly engrossed in some YouTube video. When we got up the stairs, we found her in the gym – practicing her strength and the skills her coach told her she needed to work on.

It was at that moment, I knew that her failure was absolutely the best thing that could have happened.

She then asked us to start taking her to more classes. She started taking two tumbling classes a week, an intermediate girls class and going to open gym for two hours on the weekends. She was incessantly handstanding all over the place. She did all the strength and core work at home. She would leave for school at 8 am and some days not get home until 8:30 pm. At that moment of failure she had a choice; quit, settle to just take classes, or work her a** off at something she was not naturally good at.

The week after she didn’t make team, I was at a business dinner and shared how happy I was she didn’t make the team. Another mother at the table looked at me like I was the worst mother ever – I didn’t care. She was seemingly appalled by my celebratory reaction to Antonella’s failure. Kids need to learn that they don’t get everything they want. Life is full of disappointments. You have to work (hard) for things you want and even when you do, you may not get them. They also need to learn that without failure, you don’t succeed.

Fast forward to last Monday night. Ella was working late after tumbling class on her back handspring and some other skills. We were the last to leave the gym around 8:45 pm. Late night for a 5th grader. She got home from gymnastics the next day and I happened to meet her in the garage as she got home – ready with my usual mom prodding about school, her friends, practice etc. She smiled coyly and looked down at the ground. She then told me Coach Brooke asked her to stay after. That’s when the coach told her she made pre-team. She had no idea. I had no idea. Her hard work had paid off. Her coach took notice. Antonella had EARNED her spot. It wasn’t given to her. Her coach followed up the good news with, “I only want kids who work hard. If you stop working hard, you will be removed from pre- team. If you keep working hard, you may actually make it from pre-team to team. Your work is just starting.”

In life we fail, in order to succeed, to keep working harder. Many adults haven’t figured this out yet. I am so inspired by Antonella. She makes me proud. I may also succeed at one of my life goals which is to not raise an a$$hole.

Why I Love Infographics

By | Be Genuine, Create Value, Inspire Ideas, Invoke Passion

In the early days of SoapBox, like a lot of startups, we had a tiny marketing budget. By being selective with our dollars and as persistent as cockroaches, (yes, someone called me a cockroach – although not the worst thing I have been called), we managed to carve out a name for ourselves. You can read more about our early marketing efforts here.

Although we’ve grown as a company, I still love behaving like a scrappy, nimble startup (plus, we still don’t have much budget). That’s one of the reasons why I love using infographics as a marketing tool. Yes, and…infographics are:

Identifiable: Infographics help to convey your brand personality— using colors, images, and a quirky design. Visual storytelling leaves a lasting impression on your clients.

Digestable: They provide a large amount of information in easy to consume, bite-sized pieces. Not everyone has time to sit down and read a 10 page white paper? I always mean to, but it often gets pushed aside.

Shareable: They are spreadable – maybe they even go viral. People are always looking for something to spice up their social media pages.

Valuable: The infographic I’m sharing today helps marketers understand how people search for the things they want to buy. And it gives clients an insight into how SoapBox uses data to reveal these insights.

And they just make me happy.

You can download your own copy of the Digital Path to Purchase here.

SoapBoxSample Jax Amy Poehler

Amy Poehler — Improv Comic or Sales Guru? Part 2

By | Be Genuine, Be Reasonable, Inspire Ideas, Motivate Others
If you read last week’s BLOG, you are probably just as disappointed as me to hear that Amy did not reach out to me and tell me how brilliant she thought the BLOG was. That probably would have made an awesome BLOG for this week, but since she didn’t, here is Part 2 as promised. Blame Amy.
 

The Not-So-Obvious Characteristics a Sales Person Should Have Part 2

Sales people need to have the answers.
 
Yes, and…when they don’t have the answers, it is ok to be the “one” who knows how to get the answers. Often sales people are too afraid to not answer a question or say I don’t know. This is super dangerous. Some of the most successful sales people achieve success because they know how to connect prospects with the right people to get the answers. Don’t try to be a know-it-all. Just try to be a know-where-to-get-the-info-all.
 
Sales people need to know how to answer questions.
 
Yes, and…they also need to be curious. Genuine curiosity can often uncover clients’ needs sales people may not even be aware of. Asking “why” or “how does that impact you” or “what have you tried before”. Asking probing or follow-up questions in lieu of just accepting a response at face value can be the differentiator between you and your competitor.
 
Sales people need to close the deal.
 
Yes, and…they also need to admit when they are not the right fit. Staying focused on closing the deal may lead to overselling, undelivering and ultimately winning a one-time customer. Instead, if you are not a fit, admit it, offer an alternative solution and remind the prospect what you are a good fit for and what types of problems you can help them solve. A prospect is more likely to come back next time around as opposed to buying an un-needed product or service a second time.
 
Sales people need to keep the client happy.
 
Yes, and…they need to be willing to push back when the client has unrealistic expectations. Scope creep, intentional or unintentional can kill a relationship. Be honest with your client about what they are asking. Don’t just agree to everything and assume you have to say yes. Sometimes, clients are asking for things they may not even need which gives you the opportunity to come up with a solution that works for the client and your own company.
 
Sales people need to know their numbers.
 
Yes, and…well they need to know their numbers. What is the goal, how many calls, to get how many proposals to close how many deals in how much time? What is the average deal size? How long is it taking you?
 
Sales people need to be confident.
 
Yes, and … they need to trust the knowledge they have already gained but they also need to be coachable. They need to be able to take advice from senior management, and have the flexibility to change their styles or adopt new selling techniques if their industry demands it.
 
Click here to read the rest of the not-so-obvious characteristics. If you have any of your own to share, tweet me @jax_rosales